H i, sweetie.  It’s me Debra. I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately and since we have officially arrived in the month of February, I wanted to create a Valentine for you.

D’you know what?  

I flat out adore you

Honestly, I do!

You may say, “oh come on … you don’t even know me”, but hear me out.

You’ve got a beautiful soul.  I know that’s true.

And, maybe, because life’s has been so challenging for … hm-m … a long time now, you’ve been telling yourself that you must not really deserve to be loved and that most likely happiness just isn’t going happen for you.

So let me tell you what I can do for you.

When you are feeling overwhelmed by life – torn at needing to fit everything into your schedule, accomplish the big picture goals, keep on top of the laundry and get a decent amount of sleep, I can help you.  What we’ll do is look at all the pieces of the puzzle that is your life – and rearrange them in an a new order – an order that makes you say “awwww – that feels good”.  This may require throwing away some of the pieces that belong to other puzzles – the ones that you included in  your puzzle box of life because you should.

Think of me as “Johnson’s No More Tangles”.   I can help you un-tangle your schedule and your life.

When you feel scattered  – as in that feeling where not only are you not living your life – you are just hanging on by the knuckles to survive – I am here for you.  To hold space for you as you allow yourself to fall apart – and to help you pick up the pieces and reassemble them into something that feels like a life you can thrive in.

When you feel shame…that soul-sucking shame over your life experiences, past choices and/or what you really want out of life, I am here to listen – to hold your hand – to help you see the best in yourself.  I’m not squeamish about relationship messes, familial squabbles, the fight with your best friend nor the details of your sex life.  There is never “TMI” where you’re concerned. 

I won’t judge you at all – instead I can tell you that I understand.

When you are worried, I am here for you to unload your burdens.  I’ll help you sort through the things that are within your control – and help you realize what eggs you are holding from another person’s basket.  Your basket is a customized size made just for you – and  can only hold your eggs, sweetie.  Other people are responsible for their own eggs – and the rest of the eggs belong in God’s basket.

When you are scared, I’m here to be your cheerleader.  I know that deep within you lies courage.  You just don’t recognize it.  Or maybe –just maybe – you feel you need permission from someone else to be courageous.  I’ll give you permission to step up in your own life and make it your own.

When you confess to me that you don’t want to live the life you are expected to live, I will understand.  I’ve been there –living a life that I was expected to be living – being the perfect mother and the perfect wife.  When it all fell apart, I began to discover what I really wanted in life and became an explorer and an adventurer.  I learned that living outside the lines of polite society’s expectations is an awesome place to live.

I will support you in pursuing your dream and breaking out of your shell.

I’ll confess that at times, I may make you angry.

That’s because I see the best in you and won’t always believe the bullshit excuses and stories you have about yourself.  When I question the rules you’ve written for yourself – and the story you’ve fondled to death, I know that you may get angry with me.  I’m not doing it to make you angry, though it may.  I’m doing it because I love you. 

And because I see the best you that you can be – even if you are unable to see it in this moment.

I believe in spirituality and will support you in your pursuit of the religion of your choice.  I will encourage you to meditate, because I know that when you are quiet and still, the real truth of what you need and want in life will surface.

I will encourage you to write – to write about the things in which you are grateful.  To  celebrate the amazing things you do each and every day.  To give yourself credit for your accomplishments.   To define your own version of success.

I will encourage you to be kind to yourselfTo treat yourself with love and respect.  To get enough sleep, eat good food,  get a little exercise and hydrate.

I’ve seen more of life that you might know.

I grew up with a mentally unstable parent.  I was in an emotionally abusive marriage.  I’ve lived with teenage girls.  I’ve traveled the country and have crossed paths with some pretty interesting characters that have forever changed the way I look at the world and I am blessed for that exploration.

I’ve given myself the gift of a loving relationship.  I say that this is a gift because I first needed to learn and understand that I deserve to be loved  – and that it’s OK to be happy.

So, yes, babe….let me assure you….

No matter how tangled or scattered you are feeling, I adore you and am here to help you.

No matter how much shame or worry you are experiencing, I adore you and I am here to listen.

No matter how scared you may be – or disillusioned you may be about the course of your life, I will adore you and help you see the fabulousness that is deep inside you.

That’s right, darlin…. I adore you exactly as you are in this very moment. Warts and all.

I’ll be honest:  I want the opportunity to work with you so that I can be in your life.  I want to serve as your cheerleader and bullshit detector.

 Our relationship will be two-fold.

I get to see your break out of your shell, shed your limiting beliefs, and begin living your life smack-in-the-middle of the zone.    I get to witness you becoming the most amazing version of yourself.

On the flip-side, your presence in my orbit helps me embrace and live my dharma – which is to serve others – and allows me to wake up excited each morning because I get to interact with an amazing and beautiful soul – YOU. 

It’s a win-win situation – a  symbiotic relationship.

So, let’s be frank….I want to stop adoring you from afar and begin adoring you up-close and personal.  Schedule a Discovery Session.  Drop me an email. Let’s figure out a way to let our orbits collide.

Because you deserve to be adored.




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By Debra Smouse: Writer, life coach, and Tarnished Southern Belle, Debra helps people fall in love with their life. An expert de-tangler, she believes in busting clutter as a path to greater clarity and that within every woman is vibrant, passionate, and sexy being just itching to make their inner sex kitten roar. A native Texan, she resides in Ohio with the Man of her Dreams.

9 Responses to “My Valentine To You” Subscribe

  1. joy February 11, 2012 at 8:14 am #

    What a beautiful letter!
    May all your ideal peeps find you, so you can guide them to their best lives.

    I’m loving this clutter busting, and my life is picking up clarity and steam…I’m grateful to be accomplishing more than before.



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